baldkiller

Well life isnt all about having fun...

i have to study hard.....FREAKING STUDY U RAVIN IDIOT!!!!!!

i have to train smart.....TRAIN LIKE A DOG...run like NEVER BEFORE!!!

i will balance my friends and family....both are important but i will manage them equally well!!!.....YES I WILL!

Best of all MY DEARIE SUNSHINE IS LOVED AND ALWAYS LOVED .....MUACKS MY BABY MONKEY take care of urself!!

throat hurts again...pain blood pain blood...yucks

it hurts.

I just wanna say sorry...for being the incapable bf...i will do my best for u
sorry abt today....i was feeling unwell and really tired...yesterday i didnt sleep properly...was waiting for ya message but none
i just wanna be stronger for u...once again sry for being rude...insensitive...foolish...pathetic...and an idiot...i am sorry...


peace love ya
ravin

Dear god...can i make myself tireless...plz i dont wanna feel tired...i dont wanna fall sick after trg...i just wanna run n keep my gf and other frends happy

please god give me strength...nose bleed...headache and sore eyes...wow SUCKY combo....plz god i got time trial tmr...give me strength...i need to put a strong front infront of others....i can do it (;

thx u god for helping...


raviin
peace out

Ok raviin boy listen up ok....its time to change yourself...

Step 1: Dont be stupid ok man....listen to yourself and be smart.

Step  2: Eat dinner with sunshine when u are out with her, unless u are low on cash...if u are just tell her she accepts you for being u ok...

Step 3: Always bring a jacket of extra pair of shirt when u are gonna meet her. She might be cold and need anotha layer...she can we us ethat clothing to smell u all the way back home.

Step 4: She doesn't end a SMS messgae...u have to be the last person to say bye...sunshine loves it when i am the last person who says bye (:
( i feel like i have been following on that)

Step 5: Call back if she miss calls u...dont just SMS her back...she gets FREAKING pissed...u dont wanna make ur  Sunshine pissed...or else she will BURN ur House and ur Face down ok (:

Step 6: Stop saying nevermind to her....if u are sick tell her and go and see a doctor ok dont try to be all MACHO and strong...let Sunshine love u (:

Step 7: Bloody hell stop comparing ok...she LOVES u for just the way u are...but i feel like doing something special and unique for her....i think i will do it when the time comes...now she wants to just enjoy u and love u like mad...and i want to do the same for her...i will always be there for her and she will always be there for me (:

Step 8: Finally STOP TALKING NONSENSE and be there for her (: MUACKS LOVE U DEARIE!!!

Thank u dearie for being with me...i am sorry for this few days...will stop doing that and will be changed ok (:

Love u dearie
i am sorry
WILL LOVE U MORE AND MORE EVERYDAY!
muacks

your dear Rainbow (:
love ya

HAHAH what an AWEOSME DAY I TELL U...it was the best thing that every happened....

sleeping over and Jansens HOUSE was PISS ASS funny....wacking leo...smacking bk...eating like a PANDI....playing playing wahahaha...sleeping beside LEO and BK was the funniest....wahahah...

When to Changi there at abt 6 plus am....alot of ppl

Boom then i saw a temple...hahah very nice took a blessing from outside and then went to do warmups

Hahah after a few accleration and all...i meet my baby at the starting LINE!!!...MUACKS she looked soo happy as though the sun was glowing in her...muacks i love soo much...she was soo happy and i was MORE HAPPY....then leo and jansen stood behind me and her...saw another guy called Devathas and Mok at the front....

Then BAAAAAAAAAA
the horn went....and we were all off...i didnt want to run to fast ahead cause i was afraid that i might get stiches and be slow...so i was a little slow for the 1st 200m or so....but after that i makan jansen and leo...and i was OFF!!!....

Finally stopped at the FINISH LINE...4th placing DAMN lost to that boy by 5 secs...or else i would have gotten anotha 100 bucks
but nvm will be better.

Timing was :

4

1170

RAVIIN S/O MUTHU KUMAR

00:35:49

00:35:57

it was MY PB!!!....
the last race was 41.20 which was the nike human race...now its 35.50 WOOOO HOOOOOOOOO....beat my pb by around 6mins...WAHHAHA


I love it...won 4th and a 100 dollars

AND OMG my DEARIE DID HER AWESOMEST she did :

5

7521

LIN YVONNE

00:44:37

00:44:45

that was amazing i love her....she got 5th and i got 4th...100+100=200 bucks WOOO HOOO
well done to u baby...eventhough u were in pain...U ARE THE BEST !!!!!!.../SALUTE

AFter that ma dearie and i went to eat AT DONUT FACTORY( sorry for making u wait)

we both love that place....yippy



2 VERY AMAZING RUNNERS AND VERY HAPPY COUPLES!!!

We love each another more and more everyday......the more time i spend with her...the more i love her...the more time i dont spend with her...the more i know she loves me (:








Just wanna say to u baby...i am so complete with u....u are the beacon of light in my life....u are my SUNSHINE...and u are always shining...to me there is nothing else in the world that can come close to u...i will always be with u forever dearie....no matter how hard it gets...no matter even if we argue...i am still urs and ur still mine...MUACKS!!!!.....i love u like u love me (:

cya later my baby <3
peace out nights

Dear god...thx for being with me...i feel soo much appreciated....thx for helping me in my exams...god i just wanna be good enough for my GF god...am i a boring person and weak person...why do i feel so tired easily why do i fall sick easily

god i wanna be strong for her my god...i wanna be her Knight in shining armour....i hope to always make her happy and smile...will be trying my best...God this coming weeks is gonna be really tough...i hope u help us both...thx u god (:


Raviin...peace out

am i doing something wrong and stupid....i think i am not good enough

i am sorry baby...will get better...will try my hardest

Will always keep u happy and satisfied...i am soo sorry if i have not been giving u much




Dear God,

I must try harder...always take care of her and protect her..she is my one and only...always be with her...i guess i must do better...please god give me more strength and willpower....i will always wanna be with her...dont take that away from me....

I will try my best...till i die...

I am sorry my baby...for all the things i have done...hope u forgive me (:
hope the things that i will do for u...will help u lose that sense of in-sercurity ...

i am a fool...cant even keep my own GF sercure....nvm I WILL PROMISE TO BE BETTER....

I RAVIIN S/O MUTHU KUMAR will DO ALL I CAN FOR MY GF...I WILL PROVE IT
(gonna sit and do a mind map now)


from ur lau ya pok BF : Raviin :(
will be better <3

I LOVE U!

HAPPY BADE SISTER....12 YEARS OLD BRAT...i love u dear sister...take care ok...ALWAYS GO FOR THE BEST....YOUR BIG BRO (:


A few songs and some phrases from it that i like....

Kryptonite-3 Doors Down

If I go crazy then will you still call me ur Superman?------->Will u still love me (:
If I'm alive and well, will you be there holding my hand---->I want u here with me baby (:
I'll keep you by my side with my superhuman might....-----> Will do everything for u (:



The Middle-Jimmy Eat World----> ESP FOR U MY DEARIE!!!!!!!!!...enjoy

Hey,
Don't write yourself off yet.
It's only in your head you feel left out,
Or looked down on.
Just try your best,
Try everything you can.
And don't you worry what they tell themselves
When you're away.

[Chorus]
It just takes some time,
little girl, you're in the middle of the ride.
Everything, everything will be just fine,
Everything, everything will be alright.

Hey,
You know they're all the same.
You know you're doing better on your own,
So don't buy in.
Live right now.
Yeah, just be yourself.
It doesn't matter if it's good enough
For someone else.


Hey, don't write yourself off yet.
It's only in your head you feel left out,
Or looked down on.
Just do your best,
Do everything you can.
And don't you worry what their bitter hearts
Are gonna say.



Living on a Prayer- Bon Jovi

Once upon a time
Not so long ago
Tommy used to work on the docks--------> sub Tommy with Raviin
Union's been on strike
He's down on his luck...it's tough, so tough

Gina works the diner all day-----------------------------> sub Gina with Yvonne
Working for her man, she brings home her pay
For love - for love

She says: We've got to hold on to what we've got
'Cause it doesn't make a difference
If we make it or not
We've got each other and that's a lot
For love - we'll give it a shot

We're half way there
Livin' on a prayer
Take my hand and we'll make it - I swear
Livin' on a prayer

Tommy got his six string in hock
Now he's holding in what he used
To make it talk - so tough, it's tough

Gina dreams of running away
When she cries in the night
Tommy whispers: Baby it's okay, someday
We've got to hold on to what we've got
'Cause it doesn't make a difference
If we make it or not
We've got each other and that's a lot
For love - we'll give it a shot

We're half way there
Livin' on a prayer
Take my hand and we'll make it - I swear
Livin' on a prayer
We've got to hold on ready or not
You live for the fight when it's all that you've got
We're half way there
Livin' on a prayer
Take my hand and we'll make it - I swear
Livin' on a prayer




Everlong- Foo Fighters

And I wonder
When I sing along with you
If everything could ever feel this real forever
If anything could ever be this good again
The only thing I'll ever ask of you
You've got to promise not to stop when I say when-------> Baby...even if it hurts soo much..and even if i say i dont want it...u must nvr stop.
She sang

Breathe out
So I can breathe you in
Hold you in


Float On-Modest Mouse

Alright already, we'll all float on.
Alright already, we'll all float on OK.
Don't worry, we'll all float on.
Even if things get heavy, we'll all float on.
Alright already, we'll all float on alright.
Don't you worry, we'll all float on.
We'll all float on.



Alive-Pearl Jam

I, Im still alive----------------------> I will always be for u DEARIE!!
Hey i, but, Im still alive
Hey i, boy, Im still alive
Hey i, i, i, Im still alive, yeah
Ooh yeah...yeah yeah yeah...oh...oh...



haha thats all baby...guess all the songs i like is somewhat linked to us (:

I <3 u dearie

ARGHHHH u dumb boy RAVIIN!

It was the last hurdle of the day and U SHITY SCREWED IT UP

never mind....u are getting better

absorbing the pain is easier now...even though it still hurts...i guess that part cant be dodged...GOSH sucks

never mind is all for the good (:

god things takes time to come and sacrifices must be made...

sometimes the last part of the day is like the killer...i need an anesthetic...numb my heart hahaha...lol that would be weird

As long as my baby is happy (:

sorry for making u feel bad dearie....i guess its just my fate to be going through this...and GUESS WAT I AM HAPPY DOING IT!!!...haha so yea (:

maybe i should have kept that too myself..now i made u worried...sorry dearie

I love u baby...will always be there for u (:

good night...sweet dreams
love ya (:
peace out l8r

i am just a kid...
i try my best to keep people happy around me
i sometimes talk too much
my good intentions sometimes backfire on me
i can somehow absorb alot of pain
i just hope it aint killing me inside..


I ravin..promise to keep yvonne as happy as i can till i die
i will teach her as much useful knowledge as i can
i will endure everything she throws at me
i will protect her till my very last breath
i will be her eyes..nose..mouth..ears..hand..legs..
she can treat me in whatever way she likes
i will be a better person



i just hope that she will live a happy life
if i cant live with her, i will choose to end my life
cause the pain of seeing someone else with her..is unbearable

i am also a human...i try my best through out  my whole life to endure pain..but god created all humans with a limit..once my limit is reached...i will just be dead...

if the purpose of my life is to teach her and make her a better person..then i will...maybe god will take me away after that...i want him to take me away...its scary to know that it might happen...but i wanna be with her...nothing must bad must happen to her and me...

i am sorry my baby dearie....to have expected things from u...i will just live my life with whatever i get...even if it is 1 kiss a year...after all once a sponge always a sponge...but dont worry...i am perfectly fine with it...thx u for being with me baby...i love u dearie

Well everything is going fine...had trg today was pretty fun haha...brothers always making me laugh my ass off...and also Coach!!

Sch is becoming creepier
Maths is bombing me...
i am forgetting stuff faster then i thought
exams coming up

yea i am screwed...so tmr is gonna be study after sch...trg then meet up with sunshine...guess its gonna be a boring start for the day...
i hope she has a fun day...(:

i feel like i am losing the capability for soo many stuff...maybe every high person..must fall...so that others can i rise..but nvm i will come back and be high again...

must focus on studies and all...i am starting to wat soo much lesser...whats happening to me...i am already underweight
nvm all will be fine...

4pm trg tmr...jansen MAKE SURE THE SUN AINT HOT!...

cut on m thigh is better now...yay...so yea yea..it was a boring sch day...and so will be tmr...take care Dearie...sleep well

PS : sleep well so that u can eat well....

Good night and tc
cya all peace
l8r...

ravin

Dear baby...this is for u...its basically what i have in my knowledge and whatever i have thought about the past few days....whatever i am going to say is what i truly believe and what i want to let u listen :)

Firstly u have been sian for the couple of days...i asked u why and u said something about family...well baby...this many  days u have seen me being quiet and all...well whenever i see u dear...i always try to think how much u are going through...and i will always try to relate to what u are thinking...so yea baby this is what i have been thinking all this while for u....why i was quiet this is what was going in my head...all for u dear...so now u noe why i was quiet in the train and all...and furthermore...my level of expectations have decreased i think...i am not sure about how u feel about it..but i think it went down..so yea haha...sooner it will be all gone (:


Family...some of us are lucky to have 1....some arent...some take it for granted and some treasure it to the max....why i am talking about this..cause of that day at Dover MRT....it broke my heart to see u like that...so yea i have to console u

So back to the topic....family baby...usually consists of a dad mom and siblings...thats ur family...dont include ur grandma and grandpa...
familu usually sticks together for one another...but some dont...

like i have said before baby...in ur case...god has already planned some thing very good for ur life...he is gonna give u the best of the best....this is cause he has put u a very uncomfortable position when u were young...as u can see now...things are slowly getting better baby...one by one god takes away the pain that u are feeling...eventhough sometimes u feel like there is no change i wanna say that there is always a change...just that u are sometimes blinded by the pain...thats why i am here baby...i am ur painkiller med...feel free to use me anytime n anywhere....i am always here to absorb ur pain baby...so dont worry ok...In ur life u are confirm gonna be smart...have a good job and u will be living happily...ofcourse in a good family...where u will be living like a queen...cause trust me baby thats what god wants u to live...thats why now its hard...but baby just endure it...u have good friends who will help u and guide u thru...i know that sometimes u look at others...u might feel upset about their family...maybe for u its different..when u grow older and cultivate a good famiy...everyone will be jealous of u baby...so yea all this pain will make u a strong person in the future baby...so yea trust me ok...

u were also sad about some other human in ur life...well baby...there is a saying that goes..."if a dog barks at u...will u bark back at the dog?"
same thing baby..i can say there are many people who are jealous of u...u are smart..pretty...confident...good runner...u can endure alot of garbage from people( ahah esp me (: ) ....so why wont people be jealous of u...( u had an interview and some article)hell even i will be jealous of u my baby...so yea baby..if u hear any bad remarks about u and all...jsut let it in thru ur ear and out...no use wasting ur energy...tears...time.. on this kind of things...people have no guts to tell u in their face...cause they noe u will beat them down anytime and anywhere....and baby i am always here to help u in ur life with anything (:

So yea and about sch...dearie...sch is soemthing that many of us hate...but look at this dearie...if u can endure soo many other sch pain...this little things that are happening in sch are nothing baby....so yea sch is only for a few more month...and i noe u can do it...furthermore there are holidays and all...so yea shld be more easier for u..stay with ur good friend and they willl help u too ok?

So yea dearie...this is what was going through my mind since monday...so yea i hope u arent angry with me and all....i am a little sick...so i couldnt come up with much...will tell u more next time...sorry for the typo error...and i hope i can always keep u happy...and i am always open to whatever u wanna give me baby...may it be good or bad...i am willing to take it...i hope u can appreciate what i have done here and hope it proves u that i am always thinking abt u and i always love u...Amen

thats all baby...i love u
take care and good night baby <3

Sorry abt today....i was still thinking about what to type on the blog...so yea i was slient...i love u the most baby..and u didn't make me sad baby :)

ALRIGHT!!.....

NO MORE HIGH TEMP's...........OH YEA!!!


NOW I CAN FOCUS MORE ON U BABY!!!

THX GOD!..

Stronger now!

sorry..better i will be ):

guess the body temperature is related to thinking...the more u think the more ur brain works...thus causing ur body to get hotter...haha stupid theroy...but seems pretty accurate

nvm a cold glass of milk...some reflecting and some sleeping will help...after all this happened before...nvr to worry...being sick is like testing ur body..mind immune system....so they will get stronger...as long as it doesnt kill me haha

So yea...even when u heart breaks...the strain around ur heart...lol i dont noe how to describe it...but i can endure it...quick thinking...a few seconds of silence...a huge release of breath...endure the pain...and VOLA!!...pain gone...its like a safety step...maybe other can try this out...works for me...all this works...hope it doesn't kill me thats all...

Better i will become...all this will help me in my life

like i heard from my sunshine "Dear...What wont kill me will only make me stronger"....and that i will follow...

PS: wanted to pass u something dear...but completely forgot...sorry ):

so yea thats it.... nights all


cya all
peace out
nitez!

 All i want to say is....i am lucky to have u

i will never ever let u go

u are the best

u are all i need...

THX U GOD ....STARS....MOON...SUN....PLANETS....ANGELS

u guys rock the world!!

Love

someways that i describe it..........


"In times like these, it is helpful to remember that there have always been times like these." (referring to the hard times we had)

"The heart has reasons that reason does not understand." (used to feel that way)

"Love is an irresistable desire to be irresistably desired."(what i am feeling now)

"Life's greatest happiness is to be convinced we are loved." (SOO TRUE!!)

"Love is not blind - It sees more and not less,but because it sees more it is willing to see less."(Thats just a nice way to put it hahah)


AND FINALLY TO MY SUNSHINE!!!

"I love you. There is nothing else to do, run and I will run with you."


To all that has been with us...and will forever be with us...i say a big thanks

 Happy Fathers Day to all DAD's, soon to be DAD's, were once DAD's and those who wanna be DAD's.....maybe u guys be happy all the time (:


To Raviin.....

life is very unexpected....life is like running in macritchie....there are always up's and down's....but the good thing is they compliment one another...like if there is a up there will always be a down and vice versa....

Sometimes life is soo funny...one moment its very simple the next it is very complicated....

here i am trying to find a balance between 2 things...

sacrifice has to come in a way on both sides i i need to balance them out

Studies track family

          vs

Studies track relationship


i need to balance them well...

i need to know how...i need to get enlightned by someone...maybe a person who has gone thru the same thing i have and can tell me what i need to do

i dont noe but what i noe is that i can try my hardest....to balance


but wat hurts me the most....is when people say i am feelingless or when ppl say that they have nvr hurt me.....infact i am that kinda person...when i am emotional hurt...my heart feels like it was stabbed....the muscles around the heart contract so painfully...it causes tears in ur eyes...u cant scream cause it has hold ur breath...all u have to do is to stare into the blank space...hoping that ur muscles will expand once again....hoping that u aren't going to die....hoping that today is not ur day to go....and all this happens with the slightest objection/rejection or just the word no...or just a head gesture which says no.....

many people dont know me well enough....they think i have it all....and they think they noe me soo well...truth is nobody does...even my parents dont...cause thats how i have sculptured myself to become...a mysterious person...i am like the da vinci code....hard to decipher...sometimes even i cant deciper myself...sounds self-contradicting....haha wait sounds like the omnipotent paradox...


Omnipotent = A being with unlimited power (Usually people say god)

There is a thing i came abt in the net....it goes like this

"Can god create a stone so heavy....that god himself cannot lift"...

so yea....thats the topic


This question generates a dilemma. The being can either create a stone which it cannot lift, or it cannot create a stone which it cannot lift. If the being can create a stone that it cannot lift, then it seems that it aint the almighty being. If the being cannot create a stone which it cannot lift, then it seems it is already not omnipotent.

some guy proposed the following....

1. Either God can create a stone which he cannot lift, or he cannot create a stone which he cannot lift.
2. If God can create a stone which he cannot lift, then he is not omnipotent (since he cannot lift the stone in question).
3. If God cannot create a stone which he cannot lift, then he is not omnipotent (since he cannot create the stone in question).
4. Therefore God is not omnipotent.

Asking God to create a stone which he cannot lift requires two things—an ability, and also a weakness: The ability to create the stone and the inability or weakness of not being able to lift it. The paradox essentially implies that God is not omnipotent because he does not have a weakness, when the definition of omnipotence is not having a weakness.

so i like i said its self contradicting.....just like what i am going thru....

If God can do absolutely anything, then God can remove his own omnipotence. If God can remove his own omnipotence, then God can create an enormous stone, remove his own omnipotence, then not be able to lift the stone. This preserves the belief that God is omnipotent because this means that God can create a stone so large that God can't even lift it. However there is a problem with this theory which is that if God were to remove his omnipotence he would not be able to restore it as he would not be omnipotent anymore. Therefore in this theory he would not be omnipotent after not being able to lift the stone.

This was essentially the position taken by Augustine of Hippo in his The City of God: ( and i liked what he said)

 "For He is called omnipotent on account of His doing what He wills, not on account of His suffering what He wills not; for if that should befall Him, He would by no means be omnipotent. Wherefore, He cannot do some things for the very reason that He is omnipotent."

Thus Augustine argued that God could not do anything or create any situation that would in effect make God not God.

Some slove it this way.....

The omnipotent being could create a stone which it cannot lift, but could also then lift the stone anyway.

thats like saying
Such a being could also make the sum 2 + 2 = 5 become mathematically possible or create a square triangle.

What i believe is that this whole thing is MEANINGLESS....

 Referencing  to "a rock so heavy that God cannot lift it" is nonsense just as much as referencing "a square circle." So asking "Can God create a rock so heavy that even he cannot lift it?" is just as much nonsense as asking "Can God draw a square circle?" or "Can god make a triangle which interior sides dont add up to 180 degress"...Therefore the question (and therefore the perceived paradox) is meaningless.



so yea thats that...WOW ok i am like brain dead from soo much hypothetical thinking....cya all peeps...and a good morning to u all...

cya all
pece out